Listening to behaviour

Behaviour Is Communication: Why Professionals Must Resist Jumping to Conclusions

Many people form judgements quickly, based on a story they’ve heard, an article they’ve read, or a past experience, without gathering information, asking questions or observing. Imagine the consequences if police, judges, lawmakers or medical professionals worked this way. Those of us who work with children and families are held to the same standard. Reserving judgement until we have enough information to make a fair assessment requires strong communication skills, sound reasoning and professional ethics. In a professional role, analysis must be accurate to be effective.

Why children need us to look closer

If skilled adults often struggle to put their feelings into words, we can’t expect children to do so. Adults also hold power and authority over children, which shapes how a child responds depending on their history and what they’ve learned at home. Some children can explain what is happening for them; many cannot.

Unless a behaviour has already been thoroughly assessed and diagnosed, assumptions such as “I’ve seen this before” or comparisons with another child are unhelpful. Every child is an individual with their own information to gather. This means observing and documenting, speaking with the people in the child’s life, completing functional and behavioural assessments, checking developmental milestones, and comparing current information with past records. Accurate, judgement-free documentation is not an administrative burden. It is what enables children and families to access the supports they need.

Heuristics and confirmation bias

Our brains use mental shortcuts, called heuristics, to save time. They can be useful, but they are often inaccurate. Even experts are prone to confirmation bias: making a decision first, then gathering only the information that supports it. When working with children, this can make a situation worse and reinforce the very behaviour we’re trying to change.

Context matters. A child who behaves differently with different adults, or at different times of day, is giving us valuable information. The same is true for adults: most of us slow down when we see a police car, and that change is about us, not the officer.

What good practice looks like

Effective behaviour analysis relies on evidence, not guesswork. Key questions include what happens before, during and after the behaviour, when and how often it occurs, how long it lasts, who is present, and whether it differs between staff, home and school. We should also examine the child’s environment: how others respond, which preventative strategies have been tried, and whether the child feels safe and supported. If a strategy hasn’t worked, learn more and try again with an open mind.

The cost of bias

Bias has serious consequences in cases of family violence and child sexual abuse, where favouring a trusted adult (a friend, relative or colleague) can place a child at greater risk. Children need adults who think clearly, listen to their behaviour and act in their best interests.

As professionals, we must keep challenging our own biases, build our knowledge, stay within our area of expertise and work collaboratively. Every child deserves to be understood as an individual, and to be listened to.